


So What Do You Do?

by morgan_cian



Series: So series [1]
Category: Original Work
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-07-05
Updated: 2013-07-05
Packaged: 2017-12-17 19:19:26
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,757
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/871083
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/morgan_cian/pseuds/morgan_cian
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>  A young porn star considers the question, so what do you do?</p>
            </blockquote>





	So What Do You Do?

**Author's Note:**

> I plead insanity okay?  This is a completely naive piece of fiction.  I have been searching way too much internet porn over the past few days and this idea wouldn't leave me alone!

So what do you do when you aren’t considered a twink any longer?

He stared at his reflection in the mirror. Deep shadows beneath his eyes, sunken cheeks, cheekbones that were a little too sharp, but lips that were still red and full. His call backs between shoots were getting longer and longer. He needed the job to pay his rent. Not that it was much of a home and but he was getting behind on payments. His looks and his body made his money. But he was still cute enough to be taken care of each night. He nibbled at his thumb, careful of the manicured nail. It was his signature move. Putting things in his mouth had made him a lot of money. Well, so far it had.

Time was a heart less bitch. It moved on even when you wanted it to stop.

“Hey, darlin’,” It was Momma. Well, not his mother, but they all knew her as momma. “You ready to get started?”

He nodded and took a seat in the make up chair. She tipped his head back by his chin. Her dark eyes scanned over his features that were starting to show his age. It was sad that you were considered over the hill in your twenties in this business. An agent actually suggested that he keep his braces just because it added the ‘youthful element.’ His orthodontist had wisely overruled the sentiment.

“Wild night?” Momma asked. Her dark eyes were so sincere and warm. It made him tremble, longing for the connection and affection that another human being could provide. Someone that was more than just a cock in his ass or his mouth, more than another round of alcohol or the latest drug, more than just being considered a thing rather than a human being with messy emotions.

He gave her his signature toothy grin. It was still a bit crooked. The orthodontist and his agent both agreed it gave him character. “You know me, momma, life of the party.”

She clucked her tongue and put the finishing touches on his face. Her hands were gentle in his hair. Not like the other guy, the one who demanded a blow job and jerked him by his hair. The bastard said cum was the best foundation.

They were distracted when one of his two partners for the orgy scene dragged in. Another twink, another bottom, another boy growing too old to be called a boy any longer, a boy whose beautiful eyes were just too old for his youthful face.

He didn’t mind. His stage name was Kieran Force. God their names were a riot. Kieran was actually plain old Kevin, Kevin Anderson. Not pornish at all, his name own stage name wasn’t any better. Aidan Starr, twink extraordinare, he twitched and Momma clucked at him again. He was long way from his small home town where he was born Austin Murphy.

Kevin squeezed his knee before taking the empty chair beside him. He liked Kevin, a lot. In another life where he finished school and relied on his brain rather than his body, maybe he could have met Kevin and had a healthy relationship, albeit a three way relationship, because they would be true bottoms no matter what incarnation.

Their hands intertwined between them, enjoying the quiet of Momma’s presence. It would be too soon and the lights would be hot, the room would be cold and snickers would be heard in the background. “Such a tight ass,” “God, I want to fuck his mouth,” “Look at the little bitch take it,” and his least favorites, “Can’t he keep it up, he’s wasting film,” “Have you seen a cock that small, no wonder he’s the bitch,” and so on and so on.

“Are you going to Heat?” Kevin broke into his thoughts.

Heat, the newest club, but they were all the same. He gave Kevin an absent smile and shrugged his shoulder. His fingers went to his mouth automatically but Momma stilled them.

It was his life. When he had a shoot, it lasted most of the day. He would go home shower, clean out his body, and smoke. Then he would pop a mild sedative to sleep into late into the night. Water, an enema, club clothes, plenty of smokes, and some money and he was on the town. Alcohol, drugs, blow jobs in the back rooms, sex in the bathrooms, taken to a hotel and fucked, he would drag his ass back to his empty apartment to sleep off the day and do it all again.

Kevin gave him a tired smirk. They often saw each other on the club scene. Yeah, in another life they would have been close friends.

“I have a question for you two,” Momma said, closing her cosmetic cases and clearing away the debris left over from their makeovers.

They looked hot, he thought, mussed hair and wet mouths. They looked like bitches in heat waiting to be fucked, just as requested.

“Yeah, momma?” Kevin’s voice was still youthful and little husky. How he wished his had stayed the same, but for some reason it had gotten lower. So outside of moaning, he had very few lines. Not that there were many lines in porn to begin with, Shakespeare it was not.

“When is the last time you boys had a home cooked meal?” She said the remark off handedly.

Kevin sighed. He kept his attention on Momma. No one really knew her well, outside of her fantastic work. She would report on time and leave as soon as the shoot was over. Never really rubbing elbows with the crew, just kind words to the models. To her credit, she must have been around, she never blushed or cringed or had a disparaging word.

“You know we keep our weight down, Momma,” He tried to keep the reproach out of his voice. Momma meant well.

“I know,” She replied seriously. “I want the two of you to come to this address at about eight. Is that too early?”

He met Kevin’s gaze. It surprised him a little that the other boy was considering it. Maybe he was lonely too. Maybe he needed a friend that didn’t look at him like a slab of meat. Maybe he was longing for the comfort that Momma was offering.

“No, ma’am,” Kevin replied quietly. “I don’t know about Aidan, but I’ll be there.”

“It’s Austin,” he replied quickly. He felt like something was slipping away and he was desperate not to be left behind. “I’d like to be there too.”

She smiled at them both. Her hand was soft as she carefully touched his cheek. She did the same to Kevin. “I’m glad. I think you might like what I have to offer.”

Maybe he had taken a little too many of the pills that his top had given him the night before. He shook his head to clear it. Did she just proposition them?

“Starr! Force! Get yer skinny asses out here!”

*~*

What the hell was he doing? He had his tank top tucked into his low riding jeans and flip flops on his feet. The desert heat was blistering and the sun was just going down. If this was a drag, he could at least cruise the club strip. Maybe he wasn’t dressed for the dark and strobe lights, but some hot top could still take him for the night and rock his world.

Another cab pulled up and Kevin slid out with his sensual grace. He was dressed in the same fashion except he had a long sleeved tee tied around his narrow hips. Kevin had always seemed smarter than him.

The other boy held out his hands and he went into them gladly. Their kiss was friendly and wet but not deep. He couldn’t help it. He snuggled into the embrace, even if it was for a few seconds.

“So what should we do?” He asked, feeling a little helpless.

Kevin shrugged and looked around. He was the one that noticed the security screen. “Maybe we should have stayed in our cabs.”

He followed the other boy’s gaze. Behind the gate was a long driveway. The mini mansion was beautiful. He watched as Kevin touched the call button, hesitant as if it would bite him.

“Yes?” He blinked. It wasn’t momma’s voice. It was a guy’s voice. Must be the security personnel.

Kevin cleared his throat. “Kieran Force and Aidan Starr,” the response was automatic, ingrained into them by their management. The box was quiet.

He rubbed his bottom lip with his thumb. Kevin gave him a helpless pleading look. Taking a breath, he jabbed the button.

“Kevin and Austin to see momma,” His words were slurred in his rush.

The gates swung open smoothly. They looked at one another and began the long walk down the drive, quiet and lost in their own thoughts.

*~*

He was surprised that the front door was open. He went to step inside but Kevin grabbed his arm.

“What the hell are we doing?” The boy hissed. “This could be some serious fucked up shit.”

He had to think about it. Truly. They only knew momma from the sets and she was nice. On the surface, she was always kind and solicitous. But today, the off handed proposition should give them pause and make them think. But what the hell? He had walked into too many backrooms and too many anonymous hotel rooms to really fear this. What was the worse thing that could happen? His death? Like that would be true hardship. His family kicked him out when he was fifteen and found out that he was gay. He made his way west bed hopping and hitching. He danced on tables, sucked and fucked until a talent agent scoped him out and gave him an opportunity in the porn industry. If he never walked away from this house, he wouldn’t be missed. His DVD sales would still make money and his landlord would think he skipped out on his last month’s rent. Not a ripple, not a whisper. Austin Murphy would not be remembered.

“I don’t care,” he replied and walked into the quiet foyer. The house was eerily quiet. So maybe this was mistake. He had just enough cab fare in his pocket to get him back to the city. Back to clubs, back to using his body. Back to where he belonged.

A soft moan startled them both. Kevin’s fingers almost crushed his own in his panic. But he was intrigued. Maybe it was a death wish but he pulled Kevin along behind him, deeper into the quiet house. He knew that kind of moan, Kevin would as well.

It was the sounds of pleasure, real moans instead of staged ones. It was the kind of pleasure that would lead to lust and then to sex. He just wasn’t sure if it was man or a woman. He really hoped it was a guy. Not that he didn’t like momma. Women fucking gave him the heebie jeebies.

They stopped in the doorway of the brightly lit kitchen. It was guys, alright, and his cock was straining for attention in his tight jeans. They weren’t boys like he and Kevin. They were men and they were gorgeous.

They were of the same height, the dark headed just a tad shorter. He had his arm wrapped around the taller ones hips and his hand against the prominent bulge in loose khaki shorts. The taller one was also younger. He was panting against the older one’s lips. His long fingers cupping the square jaw and thin lips as he writhed.

Kevin broke the scene by gasping loudly.

He was almost let down when they sprung apart. The dark haired one turning to lean against the cabinets, hiding his groin, the younger one turned his back completely. The tell tale jerk of his elbow revealed that he was adjusting himself in his baggy shorts as well.

“Hey there,” The older one had an accent. Not thick and barely noticeable, but there. His cock twitched again. “I take it Caroline didn’t warn you boys about us?” He must have had read their confusion. Who the fuck was Caroline? The guy cleared his throat, “Caroline. That’s right; she said ya’ll call her momma. No, she didn’t warn you about us at all. She’s sneaky like that.”

“Yeah, she is,” the younger one piped up, turning to face them again, his face still a little flushed. “I hope you guys don’t mind but she left this message for you.”

He reached for Kevin’s hand. If this was some fucked up shit, he didn’t want to let his friend go as they raced for the door to get the hell out of there. The younger man gestured to the open laptop, the screen saver bouncing madly. It faded away as the man fiddled with it and Momma appeared on the screen.

“Kevin, Austin,” She said apologetically. She looked like she was sitting at a desk and a little harassed. “I didn’t have a chance to call you boys before it was too late. I’m currently writing and don’t have time to stop. You can ask my guys, to interrupt me more than this would mean severe bodily damage and a shallow grave.” Kevin let out a choked gurgle. “I should be down eventually. But this is why I wanted you to come to my home. I want you to meet my guys. I want you to know that there is a life outside of the endless circle of hell that you boys live in. Besides, what my guys want, they get. And they wanted to meet you. I talk about you both constantly. So, forgive me? If you are truly uncomfortable then George will take you home. Home, not to the strip, not to some anonymous club, but home,” She arched a brow in warning. “But if you stay, you might want to give us a chance and I’ll see you soon.”

The screen went dark.

“Fuck,” The younger one snapped as he lowered the lid to the lap top. “That is just like her. I should go drag her out of her office and make her explain. These two are scared that they’ve stumbled on some fucked up version of Deliverance.”

The older one snorted, “Or she’s just a master at setting a scene. She really needs to remember that life isn’t plotting for her stories.”

“But her stories are damn good,” The younger one replied with a smirk. He schooled his features and turned to them. “I’m Eric and this is George. Welcome to our humble home.”

Kevin got closer, almost huddled against his back. He licked his lips, feeling the bead in his tongue brush against them. He also noted that the older one was seemed very interested. George, the older one was George, the one that would take them home. That made the younger one Eric.

He sucked in a fortifying breath, “Can you guys tell us what the hell is going on?”

George chuckled, “Yes, we can. You came a long way for dinner and conversation with two bisexual males.”

Eric jabbed George with his elbow, “Caroline is worried about you boys. She’s afraid that the cycle that you are on is going to lead to death by disease or overdose. She can already hear the rumbling that you boys are getting too ‘old’ for your industry. The heifer can be an old mother hen sometimes, but her heart is in the right place.”

“Bisexual?” Kevin spoke up, “What, are the three of you in some weird relationship?”

The older man’s eyes narrowed, displaying the age lines that would spell death in their line of work, “We are. In the business that ya’ll are in you can’t tell me you haven’t heard of polyamory?”

“And what,” He said a little breathlessly, “You want to add us to your little happy fucked up family? We are gay.”

“Caroline doesn’t want to fuck you,” Eric said easily. “She gets quite enough of that from us. And yes, we would be lying if we said that we weren’t interested in having you in our home and our family. George and I fuck men and women. And the last time I looked, I’m a guy that was breathing. You two are walking hard ons for gay and bisexual males.”

“So what makes you so different,” Kevin ground out. His hand was tightening around his fingers again. It surprised him to see his friend showing so much emotion. They were used to showing empty smiles and come fuck me, big boy grins.

The two older men turned to one another and seemed to hold a silent conversation. It made his heart yearn. He didn’t have the connection with anyone.

Eric came closer and Kevin gurgled. “It would be easier in neutral territory. We know you are friends, but your decisions should be made independently. Come with me, Kevin.” He held out his hand and said gently, “I want to get to know you.”

That left him with a man that was old enough to be his daddy. And he wasn’t into that, leather and fetish clubs scared him. He just wanted some one to be nice to him. If he had to cling to it with anonymous sex, then so be it. If George wanted to fuck him and be nice, then he would spread his legs.

His shoulders slumped. He really was a whore, a slut, and every other demeaning name he had ever been called.

It startled him when George tipped his chin. When had gotten so close?

“I’m not going to hurt you, boy.” The tone was dark and warm, it made him shiver. “I just want to get to know you.”

*~*

The water lapped quietly. It gave him the insane need to giggle. How many scenes had he done in and around a pool? But this wasn’t porn, this wasn’t a scene, no one was going to call ‘cut.’ This was his life. A life that he had just existed in before meeting the man sitting beside him, his life was going to change if he had the courage.

“I would be lying if I didn’t say I wanted to fuck you, Austin.” George began quietly.

His chin touched his chest in defeat. This was so crazy. Why had he actually hoped it was going to be different? That he was going to have the opportunity for more, even if it was a stranger. He pulled his shirt out of the waistband of his jeans with resignation. Well, he had planned on looking for hook up if this didn’t pan out, wasn’t he? So what if the guy was older than what he normally looked for in a top. If he was hung, then this little misadventure wasn’t going to be a complete waste of time.

“Damn,” the older man muttered, “Damn Caro and all of her naïve rose colored ideas.”

That made him pause. So momma had really put these two up to this? And if he could believe them, they all shared a bed and a life. “What do you want from me?” His voice cracked a little.

“I want to give you a chance to know that there is more to you than just your body,” George said gently. No one talked to him with such tenderness. This stranger made him yearn. “Caro comes home and tells us how you die a little more each day. The vibrant young men that she met is being lost under callous expectation and shallow desires.”

That made him bristle, “It’s not like we are being forced. I chose to the job. I like my job, I’m good at my job. I like fucking. Who are you or anybody for that matter to judge me,” He panted.

“I’m not judging you. And neither is Caro or Eric,” He had to stop himself from flinching when George touched his hair. His hair was petted before it got fisted. It got fisted to direct his sucking when he was giving head. “What are you going to do when you get ‘too old?’” The dark eyes pinned him under their weighty gaze.

“There are other porn industries,” He said flippantly, “My name will get me in the door. I can deep throat and there’s always a need for bottoms. I’ll survive.” He shrugged his shoulder.

George nodded. He rubbed his neck with his hand, causing one bicep to flex. Despite the weirdness of this conversation, he wanted to whimper. His cock was very interested in the male specimen sitting beside him.

“You would survive,” George said conversationally. “But are you living? Don’t you want more in life? An anchor in this world? Someone to come home to and to hold onto?”

Fuck the bastard, he wasn’t going to cry. Even if that was what he desired more than anything, it was none of these people’s business.

“So what are you offering? A place in your lives, in your beds, for the use of my body,” He snarled. “Isn’t that making me the whore you all are trying to keep me from becoming?”

The look on George’s face was a little disturbing and he scooted away. It was a combination of lust, concern, tenderness, and gentle caring. Not what he wanted in a top at all, nope. He wanted a man that took what he needed and then left him the hell alone.

Yeah, that’s what he wanted. An anonymous fuck and his empty apartment, it was his life and he was proud of it.

“Come here, boy,” George said gruffly. Now they were getting somewhere, his mind chided as the muscular arms maneuvered him onto the man’s legs and held tightly. “You aren’t a whore,” The man said against his ear, “You are so much more. And I’ll show you. I know you don’t have any reason to trust me. But what have you got to lose?”

It made him rethink his thoughts upon entering the house. He rubbed his cheek against the soft material of the black t-shirt. He was willing to give up his life on a whim. George and his family were offering more. More than he ever thought possible for a dried up, used up twink like him.

“Are you going to try and change me?” He said quietly. These feelings were so new, so overwhelming.

The broad hand went into his hair, the touch so gentle it made him murmur happily. “No, baby boy, we happen to like you just the way you are. We just want you to be healthy and loved, no more, no less.”

He sat back a little. Giving into his own impish impulses, he touched the man’s face earning him a grin. “So you don’t mind that I work in porn?” George shook his head. “What about relationships?”

The man cocked his head to the side and studied him, “Well,” He drew out the word, “If your friend is agreeable with Eric, then you will have three lovers on hand at all times. Eric and I are pretty open, we just ask that you talk to us, because Caroline is involved as well. We don’t do condoms because we are all faithful to one another. We know by industry standards you and Kevin are clean as well. But if you still want to play the field, then we would insist on protection.”

That made sense.

“So when will you fuck me?” He held his breath.

George moved restlessly beneath his bottom. “Baby, I would fuck you right now. I want to get to know every inch of you. But that’s not what this about. I want to know you. So will Eric and Caroline. And what about Kevin, do you know him that well?”

Suddenly the world had depth and breadth that he had never dreamed of. It was always about fucking and getting what he needed to survive. He was given a chance to live life.

“But I will tell you,” George chuckled, “I’m dying to kiss you. I’ve never kissed anyone with a tongue piercing. Eric and Caro won’t give in to my demands.”

He lifted brow and leaned forward in the man’s lap. His hip brushed the warmth of the erection that George contained within his tight jeans. “I have more.”

The older man whimpered and squirmed a bit more. “More what?”

It felt good to know that he turned the man on sexually. It felt good to know that George wasn’t going to pressure him. It also felt strangely good that if he pushed him, George would deny him, wanting the sex to mean more when they eventually had it. What a concept?

“Piercings?” He flicked his tongue, showing off the round bead. He liked teasing George. The older man watched him closely as he pointed to the small studs in his nose and to the side of his bottom lip. He kept those small as not to be too distracting. He sat back and lifted his shirt. The tiny hoop in his navel glistened in the lights surrounding the pool. George’s hands encircled his waist, rubbing his back softly. It felt good not to be groped. “I have tattoos as well.”

“Then Eric will be your greatest fan,” George stated a little breathlessly. “I’ve told him if he won’t get pierced, I won’t get inked.”

That made him laugh but he went serious pretty quickly. “I want to check on Kevin. I want to make sure he’s okay.” The older man smiled at him and led him back into the house.

Kevin’s eyes were swollen from crying, but he sat on Eric’s lap in the small breakfast nook. His dark head rested on the younger man’s chest. Momma or Caroline as she was truly named moved about the kitchen quietly.

George’s arms held him possessively and he felt safe. “Kevin?” He knew his tone was a little desperate, a little needy, but he didn’t want to feel alone in this world that had gone crazy.

The boy opened his reddened eyes. His gaze was little bleary as he licked his lips. “I’m staying.” He said a little forcefully, burrowing into Eric’s arms.

He knew his grin was a mile wide. “Good, me too.”

*~*

So what do you do when you aren’t considered a twink any longer? He had to laugh as he shrugged on his robe and gave his top a smacking kiss. He showered quickly and threw on his clothes.

Eric and Kevin were wrapped around each other in the back seat of the convertible. George leaned against it with his arms crossed. His grin was lazy as he caught sight of him. He met him half way and caught him about the waist when he jumped.

“I’m getting to old for this, boy.” He growled nipping at the sensitive flesh of his neck. He tightened his legs around his man’s hips. He got kisses from Eric and Kevin when he was deposited into the passenger seat.

His laugh was carefree as the wind blew through his wildly colored hair. Eric had approved of the blonde patches dyed into his dark hair. George had just been amused. They drove down the strip and out of the city towards home. Home was where Caroline was madly typing away at her new novel. She gave up her job as a make up artist. She was quite satisfied with her life.

So what do you do when you aren’t considered a twink any longer?

Well, if you are lucky, he thought breathlessly as he curled in Eric’s arms and kissed Kevin’s panting mouth. George had already dozed off. If you were lucky, an angel intervened and showed you that there was more to life. There was love and an unlikely family. So what do you do when you aren’t considered a twink any longer? You learn how to love and to live. You didn’t have to give up who you were, just dare to hope that there was more.

As his eyes closed, he smiled. So what do you do? You get more.

 

 

A/N: Insane, right? ;-P And cookies if you know who I was referencing. I guess this could be called real person fiction because of who I used as muses, but no money was made or harm was done, so it's all good *grins* MC 


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